i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
