laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
