How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Randomize
