i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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