we're blogging at a bar
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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