Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
