the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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