I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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