You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
