Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
