Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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