He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
