im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Life is so much better after having sex.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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