Dual....:-)
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize