Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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