You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
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