He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
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