she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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