Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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