Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
