i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize