So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Randomize
