just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
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