ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
