why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize
