And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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