By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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