Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i think i have herpe
just one?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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