I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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