didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
