What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
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