Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol

  (1-813): View more from Florida

  well its been awhile since I've surfed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol (1-813): well its been awhile since I've surfed http://tfl.nu/lkwy
  Replies (4) Good night (1967) Bad night (462)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :( http://tfl.nu/vkw0
  Replies (3) Good night (681) Bad night (834)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me. http://tfl.nu/6um2
  Replies (22) Good night (4115) Bad night (610)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful http://tfl.nu/0wk6
  Replies (8) Good night (1441) Bad night (3880)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch. http://tfl.nu/yicm
  Replies (13) Good night (2029) Bad night (3161)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20. http://tfl.nu/e9d3
  Replies (10) Good night (4055) Bad night (885)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (865): Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night. http://tfl.nu/cs1a
  Replies (22) Good night (582) Bad night (2835)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask. http://tfl.nu/uqhe
  Replies (16) Good night (2690) Bad night (611)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week http://tfl.nu/49ff
  Replies (1) Good night (1147) Bad night (355)
• Favorite

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (985): I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic. http://tfl.nu/92jk
  Replies (2) Good night (637) Bad night (590)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end. http://tfl.nu/ykik
  Replies (4) Good night (1057) Bad night (548)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane http://tfl.nu/c9oo
  Replies (12) Good night (865) Bad night (637)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work http://tfl.nu/uldi
  Replies (6) Good night (477) Bad night (769)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die. (505): But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess http://tfl.nu/nbb1
  Replies (3) Good night (506) Bad night (237)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency http://tfl.nu/hlej
  Replies (5) Good night (413) Bad night (393)

Randomize