then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.