You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I just forgot I was standing up.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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