So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
