am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
so much tequila, so little girl.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
and you fell through a lawn chair
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