she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
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We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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