dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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