she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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