so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
