It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
