i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize