Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize