at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
