do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Soap is not a condiment
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
