i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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