Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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