She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
