Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
