I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
