i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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