That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
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