we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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