I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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