He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
