Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Acid is not a monday night drug
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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